I am not afriad of tomorrow, for I have seen yesterday and I love today~William Allen White

Recently in China, a 29 years old  man went searching for his missing girlfriend online.  A good relationship for four years suddenly went the other way whereby she refused to answer his calls or speak with him.  This couple was at the stage of getting married and the man was prepared to go to the girl’s house to meet her parents.  However, the man decided to ask his brother to take his place to visit the girl’s family and ask for her hand in marriage.  It turned out the 29 years old is handicapped and is no taller than 1.4 meters, so he decided to send his brother instead.  When the girl opened the door and saw who was at the door, she decided to tell her parents the truth.  The parents absolutely refuse the marriage and forbid them from seeing each other again.  The girl was hurt to find another man at the door and told him if it is up to her, she would agree to the marriage.  However, she would only get married with her family’s blessings; it is very clear the family strongly oppose to the relationship.  Crying and in tears, the girl chose her family over love, and the relationship ended with the man kneeling on the floor begging the girl to accept the ring he should have handed her the first time.

It is not his fault to be born with a physical handicap, and rather than moping around everyday, he created something for himself.  He goes to work, he started dating, he plans for the future, he really is no different from other people.  However, he is fully aware of his physical handicap, so he has his brother go to the girl’s house in his place.

The family only wants what is best for their daughter, they want to make sure she is taken care of, not end up being the caretaker or have a husband that might die way earlier than her.  The family’s refusal to the marriage is their way of showing love for the daughter.

The girl loves the man because she sees past his physical disability and stayed with him for four years.  She has strong familial piety to her parents and only wish to marry with the blessings of her family.   However, she has to consider the fact when they get married, they have to take care of her parents and her two brothers who are not working yet.  The man has to also take care of his own parents, and the burden only increase when they have children.  When she refused to accept the ring and decided to leave with her family, she understands her parents worked work and spend their life raising her and only want what is best for her.  If it is up for her to decide, she would marry him, but she knows it is just not herself she has to think about. 

There is no right or wrong, maybe it is just not meant to be.


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